You make friends at work through lots of small moments: learning names, eating lunch with your team, asking questions, helping when you can and saying yes to some of the after-work events. In a first job or internship, those friendships sit inside a business with its own rules, incentives and power dynamics, so be friendly with everyone and careful with what you share until you know people well.
Why do workplace relationships matter?
Safe Work Australia lists poor support, and conflict or poor workplace relationships and interactions, among the common psychosocial hazards at work: things that could harm someone's mental health. It says these hazards can create stress, and stress that comes often, lasts a long time or runs high can cause psychological or physical harm. Bullying and harassment are on the same list. Under the model work health and safety laws, a business must manage those risks.
For a new starter, the useful relationships fall into four groups:
- your graduate or intern intake, who are going through the same first months at the same time
- people a year or two ahead of you, who remember what those months were like
- the team you sit with, who know how the work gets done
- your manager.
How do you make friends at a new job?
- Learn names and use them. Write them down after your first few days if you need to.
- Take your lunch break, and eat it with people when you can. Taking your lunch break is one of the first habits in headspace's tips from young people who had recently started new jobs.
- Ask questions. The same tips say most people will recognise that you are new and be helpful, and that it is OK to ask for help when you cannot remember something. A question about how something works is also an easy way to start a conversation.
- Offer help where you can, even with small things: a hand before a deadline, a coffee run, taking notes in a meeting.
- Join something. If your workplace has a social club, a sports team, a committee or an employee network, sign up for one.
- Say yes to some of the after-work events.
Then give it time. If you are the quiet one at work, our networking guide for students has a section on that.
How do you make friends when you work from home some days?
Come in on the days your team is in. Turn your camera on in team calls when you can. Ask someone for a quick call about a question. If your intake has a regular catch-up, go to it.
Are work friends real friends?
They can be. Remember how the friendship started. Corporate jobs exist to make money. Everyone in the office is paid to be there, and the business pays them because it expects to get more value back than it spends. Your work friendships sit inside that structure, with its own rules and incentives. A colleague you get on well with may later manage you, review your work or go for the same promotion.
What should you keep to yourself at work?
Three rules for a first job:
- Don't overshare early on.
- Don't vent about your manager on Slack or Teams, even after two beers with a colleague you have known for three months.
- Don't put anything in writing you would not stand behind.
Work chat is less private than it feels. The Fair Work Ombudsman's best practice guide on workplace privacy tells employers to make clear to staff that electronic communications and social media are not private, that the business can delete what staff put into its systems at any time, and what it records and keeps, such as the content and patterns of employees' emails and browsing, and who can access those records. The same guide lists not sharing personal information about customers or colleagues, including photos of them, through social media, email or other means. Read your employer's policy on email, chat and social media in your first week.
Stay out of workplace politics. You can be decent to everyone without adding fuel to someone else's fight.
What about after-work drinks?
Go to some of them. They are an easy way to meet people outside your own team and to see your colleagues away from their desks.
Drink at a pace you would be happy for your manager to see, and leave before the conversation turns to people who are not there. When you organise drinks for your intake, invite the whole group.
How do you keep a life outside work in your first job?
Keep seeing your uni friends, your family and whoever you play sport with. In headspace's tips, one young person suggests setting clear boundaries from the start, such as not checking work emails outside work time. Another books social plans in advance, from dinner with family to a friend's soccer game or the gym, as a reminder that work is only part of who they are.
How much does your manager shape your first job?
A lot. Every company has its own culture, and it changes with the department, the team and whoever manages you. A toxic manager can make a job at a great company miserable. Our view is that people and culture deserve as much weight as brand name or salary when you choose where to work.
You can test this before you accept an offer. Use your questions at the end of an interview to ask who you would report to, how the team works together and what past graduates in the team have gone on to do. If you can, talk to someone who works there. Our guide to the STAR method covers the questions they will ask you.
What should you do if a work friendship goes wrong?
If it is a small falling-out, talk to the person directly and early, keep it about the work and keep it out of group chats.
Some behaviour goes further. The Fair Work Ombudsman says bullying happens at work when a person or group repeatedly behaves unreasonably towards another worker and the behaviour creates a risk to health and safety. Its examples include teasing or playing practical jokes, pressuring someone to behave inappropriately and excluding someone from work-related events. Workplace sexual harassment under the Fair Work Act does not need to be repeated: it can be a one-off. Reasonable management action carried out in a reasonable way is not bullying. A manager can make decisions about poor performance and direct how work is done.
The Fair Work Act's anti-bullying laws apply only to certain workers, and the Fair Work Ombudsman's list includes interns and students gaining work experience. If something is happening to you, it says you can talk to a supervisor or manager, a health and safety representative, human resources, a union or a lawyer. If the national laws do not cover you, each state and territory has a work health and safety body that can give advice about workplace bullying. Our guide to workplace bullying in Australia covers what counts, what does not, and how to apply to the Fair Work Commission for an order to stop it.
Common questions about friends at work
Should you add work friends on social media?
Wait until you know them. Before you do, check what is public on your own profiles, for the privacy reasons above.
What if you don't click with your team?
Be friendly and professional with them, and look for friends elsewhere in the business: your intake, a social club or a project with another team.
Sources
- Safe Work Australia, Psychosocial hazards (poor support, conflict or poor workplace relationships, bullying and harassment as common psychosocial hazards, stress and harm, a business's duty to manage the risk, read 8 October 2026)
- Fair Work Ombudsman, Workplace privacy best practice guide (electronic communications and social media are not private, deleting data, what is recorded and who can access it, not sharing colleagues' personal information or photos, content last updated 16 January 2026, read 8 October 2026)
- Fair Work Ombudsman, Bullying in the workplace (definition, examples, sexual harassment can be a one-off, reasonable management action, who the anti-bullying laws cover including interns and students, who to talk to, state and territory work health and safety bodies, content last updated 17 June 2026, read 8 October 2026)
- headspace, young people share their top tips for: starting a new job (taking your lunch break, asking for help, people recognising a newcomer and helping, not checking work emails outside work time, booking social plans in advance, work as only part of who you are, last reviewed April 2024, read 8 October 2026)
- Capital W, The Bulletin: Term 3, Week 2 (September 2026) (corporate jobs exist to make money, rules, incentives and power dynamics, culture changes with the team and manager, choosing on people and culture, the three rules on oversharing, venting and writing, staying out of workplace politics)
First ran in the Capital W Bulletin.
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